I LOVE GAY PEOPLE!!!!!!!
This week a Dutch gay magazine 'Expeszo' or something like that, send several of his magazines to diffrent schools. They did this to make homoseksuality an easier topic to talk about. A few schools send the magazine back, with the message that they didn't dare to show it to their students because they were affraid of the comments from the parents or students themselves. That really makes me wonder how 'normal' homoseksuality is to several countries and even to Holland! The country where pot, prostitution and porn are the biggest things! And then gayness is odd?
I have a friend who is biseksual, and I adore him! My mom is a stewardess and she works with guys that are HILARIOUS! What is the fucking problem?!
Maybe people think they have seks in a way they think is grosse? Because the biggest part of gay couples never have anal sex.
Is it the problem that there are 2 men or 2 woman? Why do guys think it's okay if 2 girls kiss because it makes them horney and if 2 guys kiss it all like: IELK!
I mean, come on! They are just like you, but they like men instead of woman just like you may like something else then they do!
Also I hate the fact that gay people can't marry! Everyone can be happy in the way they want, no matter what sex they are! PURE DISCRIMINATION!
So thats why I'm saying: I LOVE GAY PEOPLE!!!!!!!!!

Frustrations...
There are alot of things that frustrate me, or irritate me, and I'll try to add a little explaination to the reason of these frustrations and irritations. The first one I can think of is girls. The girly girls. The girls who walk around the school with their bag and go to their locker and walk up the stairs go to their classroom, sit, learn and have fun with boys and girls alike. It's whats underneath thats bugging me. They're not just 'having fun' they're screaming 'I WANT YOU AS MY BOYFRIEND, NOW!' And I'm saying boyfriend and not sex slave because thats what they want. A boyfriend. So they can show everyone around them, especially the other girls, 'look at me, look at me, I have a boyfriend!' They don't love this boyfriend, hell maybe they don't even like them, but they wanna be seen with them because then they have a BOYFRIEND! And they're always perfect, then we have a test they're always just standing there having fun but with their notebook (which is fancy colored and from a brand or name or anything that everyone knows) and they're acting like they have everything under control.
Thats another thing I hate, control. Atleast, the Dutch control. Japanese control and Chinesae control and all the other countries that have the same idea is perfect. The Dutch control is: This is what we want, now we'll do the obvious things to get there and with the time we have left, we''ll wait. And thats what kids at school do. They have their notebooks, they read and read and read and when they're sick of reading, they wait. WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR?! For the moment that the words just fly into your head? That they look at eachother and say: 'Hey, lets get off the page, and jump into her mind! Then she'll make the test okay!'
Tests are by the way also overrated. Tests used to be made to check if you really know what you're ment to know. Now they're life changers! Kids get scared, nervous, stress and all those otehr factors which you, in the end, have to go to a psyciatris for which will say 'you need to rest' and you're going to be taken away just like Susanna in 'Girl, Interrupted' while you know you're not crazy, but think there is something wrong with you because you're so stressed out, and thats all because you thought or still think that your life depends on just 1 thing: Tests!
You know who are crazy? The skaters/punks/goths in my school. They're not any of the aside, they're just crazy kids who all followed one boy who once saw Avril Lavigne with 'Complicated' said: HEY, SHE'S FROM CANADA TOO! (that guy also came from Canada and now lives in Holland, how pethetic) And decided she was 'cool' and started to dress like the nerds behind her. Then kids saw him and saw Avril and thought: WOW, He's just like her! then we need to be like them, then we're COOOOOOOOOL. So they did that and they started growing and started to listen to Avril more and more and more and started to sing with a guitar in the hall of the school, because 'YEA, THEY'RE ALTERNATIVE!'. And they made a band which became the school band and they start jumping around on stage while all the other kids (mainly boys and girls who like RnB and Hiphop) stare at them like 'what the fuck are you waisting my fucking time for?' and those alto's (thats what we call them) look at them like 'who do you hate this music? How can you? We're skaters, and we're ourselves, and you can't be yourself unless you're a skater!' WELL FUCK THEM!
This also gets me frustrated, just thinking about those damned kids and those 'perfect' girls and the fucking fact that everything in Holland is so Ducth!

It's time for me to move to Singapore.
I already looked at some houses! There was 1 for 450.000 euro's that I really really really like! I wanna live there so badly because nothing keeps me here. I'm ment to live in a country that big and high and cheap and speaks English and is filled with Asian people. How perfect is Singapore then?
*sigh* I love Real Estate...

Currently Watching Girl, Interrupted By Winona Ryder, Angelina Jolie see related

This is me... Then.

Love and all that crap

Have you ever been in love?:: I guess...

If you have, with whom?:: No one worth mentioning.

Are you single?:: Hell yea!

Are you in a relationship?:: I just told you I am single!

If so, for how long?:: NO RELATIONSHIP! S-I-N-G-L-E!!!

Do you believe there is someone for everyone?:: No, I believe there are more people for 1 person.

What is your idea of the best date?:: I don't know, I don't think you can have a proper 'perfect date' in Holland.

What was your first kiss like?:: Whoa...

How old were you when you got your first kiss?:: 14 or was it 15?

What’s the best experience you've ever had with the opposite sex?:: Oh, definitely the kissing...

If you are single, have you had any boyfriends/girlfriends before?:: Yup!

Have you ever been dumped?:: Yup!

Have you ever dumped someone?:: Yup!

What’s the most sexual thing you’ve done with the opposite sex?:: Don't even go there...

Word association

Slippers:: heels

Hat:: Burberry

Hard:: Rock

Free:: Flying

Space:: Stars

Taste:: Trying something new

Good Charlotte:: BLEARGH!

Red:: Roses

Deep:: Sum41

Heart:: Fucked up

Cord:: Music

Cheese:: Holland!

Rain:: Frogs

Work:: Hate

Pedal:: Canoe

Head:: Think

Bed:: Cuddly!

Fluff:: Bed

Hardcore:: Walking away...

Race:: France

Knife:: Flesh

Jump:: Bungee jump!

I....

Am:: Fucked up

Want:: To move

Need:: Time off

Crave:: For a new house

Love:: Kiara

Hate:: *Wont answer*

Did:: IT ALL! MUAHAHAHA

Feel:: lonely

Miss:: New York

Am annoyed by:: A lot

Am tired of:: This country

Will always:: Be fucked up

Silly stuff

What is your favourite genre of music?:: Can't say that I have one...

What time is it now?:: 8:43PM

What day is it?:: Wednesday

When’s the last time you called someone?:: Don't remember

How much money do you have right now?:: €0,50

Are you hungry?:: Nope!

Whatcha doin?:: Nothing... 'Then why don't you go to your room and do nothing...?'

Do you like parades?:: Not the Dutch parades 

Do you like the moon?:: Er... Yea...

What are you going to do when you’re done with this?:: Watch Girl, Interrupted, and you know what? I'll do that right now!

Isn’t cup a funny word when you repeat it over and over?:: Er... No

If you could have any magical power what would it be?:: The ability to fly

Have you ever had a picnic?:: Nope

Did you ever have one of those skip-its when you were young?:: Huh?

What about sock em boppers?:: Huh?

Are you wearing any socks right now?:: I don't wear socks

Do you think you are…

Funny?:: Sometimes, maybe, depends on where the person I'm funny to comes from.

Pretty?:: A little maybe.

Sarcastic?:: HELL YEA!

Lazy?:: Teehee

Hyper?:: Maybe...

Friendly?:: I guess, sometimes...

Evil?:: I guess, sometimes...

Smart?:: Uh-huh

Strong?:: Well... Yes and no.

Talented?:: In what?

Dorky?:: Sometimes...

Associate these words with someone you know (or don’t know)

High:: Freedy

Skip:: Sally Kee

Dance:: Michelle

Lonely:: I don't know... No one I guess...

Pen:: Merel

Flower:: Merel yet again...

Window:: Floor

Psycho:: I dunno

Brain freeze:: Myself... Can I say that?

Orange:: Carina

Sassy:: Cynthia

Jelly:: Monique!

For or against?

Suicide:: Not sure... It's very strange... You know what, never mind, skip it!

Love:: Against, it fucks your brains up...

Drunk drivers:: Hehehehehe, against

Airplanes:: I LOVE AIRPLANES! FOR FOR FORRRRRRR!

War:: Against, duh! Peace!

Canada:: Brittany, Alexandre Despatie... Oeh yea I'm for, but they should stop with the fucking French bullshit!

United States:: FOR! USA TODAY! YAY! *Woei*

Rock music:: Depends...

Gay marriage:: FOR!!! FOR FOR FOR FOR FOR!!!!!!

School:: Against... My school anyways...

Surveys:: For!

Parents:: For, but not too much.

Cars:: Pretty cars yea

Killing:: Well what do you think?

Britney Spears:: AGAINST! GONE GONE GONE! DIE BITCH DIE!

Coffee:: How can I decide if I never had any?

Pants:: YAY!

Would you ever…

Sky dive?:: Hell yea!

Play strip poker?:: Maybe...

Run away?:: I think so yea...

Curse at a teacher?:: I'd love to, maybe sometimes, I dunno.

Not take a shower for a week?:: I guess... Maybe once.

Ask someone out?:: I dunno, maybe (what’s with all the maybe's?)

Lie to someone to make him or her think better of you?:: Grrr... Can you guess the answer?

Visit a foreign country for more than a month?:: HELL YEA!

Go scuba diving?:: Been there, done that

Write a book?:: Don't think I could.

Become a rock star?:: I'd love to! In a movie!

Have casual sex?:: Hehehehehe

Last questions

What shampoo do you use?:: Dunno the name...

What kind of computer do you have?:: Packard Bell Windows XP!

What grade are you in?:: I hate this question because I never know what to answer!

Do you like to throw popcorn at people in the movies?:: I once did yea...

Or just make out?:: Hehehehehe... I did, but I hate to, because it's a cliché...

How many posters do you have in your room?:: 12...

How many CD's do you have?:: Not too much...

I Am Officialy Old

Thats right people, I'm old... I'm 16... Just turned 16 25 minutes ago. It's 0:25 right now...
*sigh* I noticed it when it was 0:02. Then I washed my face and brushed my teeth. My mom says 16 is an 'important moment in life'. From now on, I can drink, smoke and party legally.
But as I looked at myself in the mirror, I couldn't help but think:
In 4 years I'm 20... then I'm an official 20-something... and then I have 10 years to get happy before I turn into a 30-something and get the lable 'desperate' if I'm not 'happy' yet.
In other words, I have 14 years to go... and in other words... I just passed the 'half way to go' line. I spend more time becoming happy then I have left to make it happen.
And how far am I? I'm single. Thats as far as I am, which technically still is on the start-line, and I got a whole round to go! Yes, I have been kissed, so I got my 1st stamp for reaching the finishing line or 'happily ever after'. Is that really our goal?
I decided for myself that I never want to have children and maybe not even want to get married. How will people then look at me when I have a relationship with a man? Will they think I won, will they think I got a few more stops to go? I don't know and I don't understand...
Are we wasting time on making outselves the way that pop-culture today wants us to be or are we really doing what we want? If we are then where does the judgement coming from?

I'm sorry, it's late, I'm 16... This happens to you then, you start talking bullshit.
Sayonara,
Emilie

Currently Watching Sex and the City - The Complete Fourth Season By Sarah Jessica Parker see related

I Heart New York

I love New York. It's where my heart is. As soon as I have the money or the certainty that I will survive there, I'll move to New York, Manhattan. I've promised myself, as I said, that IF I'll ever get married, I'll do that in New York. Or else it would be like cheating on my true love.
It's together with Singapore, the only city I can go to after the 4th time. My 7th time New york is coming up on the 15th of september.
The picture on the background is, for the once who didn't know, Times Square, New York. though I can't say that thats my favourite place in New York. My favourite place in the city is at Tiffany's. Not inside, but infront of it. I can look in at the most beautiful things and look around me at the most beautiful things of the world. To me, New York is like heaven.
But why? Because it lives, it always does, and it will never go to sleep or die. New York is the capital of the world and the biggest and best and I want and love the biggest and the best.
Nothing is strange in New York, no-one will every blame you for anything there, because there's always something worse around the corner. Thats why it's, to me, the only place where everyone can be themselves without anyone judging them.
Ofcourse people judge, Stanford and Carrie from Sex and the City, as true New Yorkers (fictional, but true) loved to judge, but no-one will blame you for anything. You CAN judge, because no-one will hate you.
Ofcourse, New York can be mean and rough and cold, but at the same time it has such class... Big city and high heels.
You could live in New York all your life and stay there, because it has everything.
LA is, compared to New York, so fake! everybody smiles and is happy and everything is perfect. But around every corner is a shadow which no-one can or will see. New York is, like Alexandr Patrovski said 'honest', there's no big smile, there's no fake perfection. New York has it's wrongs, but has even more rights.

'Anything can happen... This is New York...'

Also, I thought Beautiful Day was a perfect Theme Song for New York. It's fast and changes but filled with feelings. Just like New York.